It’s Prostate Cancer Awareness Month and we’ve been catching up with Gareth from South West Wales. He talks about his experience with prostate cancer, and tells us about the ways in which he spreads awareness day to day:
I’ve been a roofer since I was 17. So how many years is that? 45 years! And I love it, I love working in construction. I’ve tried to step out into office-based roles a handful of times, and I’ve hated it every time.
I found out I had prostate cancer after experiencing pain in my testicles. At the time I just thought, well, I am sitting astride a roof when I do the ridges. But just to be safe I went down to the doctors surgery. He ruled out testicular cancer and offered me some painkillers. My wife felt that we should get a second opinion. So I went to see a second doctor and he said, ‘You’re over 50 now aren’t you, have you had a PSA test?’. That was the first time I’d even heard of one!
A PSA test is literally just a blood test, and if there was any early sign of prostate cancer they’d be able to tell from that. Any man over 50 can request one, and they can’t be refused.
I wasn’t having any of the normal symptoms associated with prostate cancer, like peeing a lot in the night, or erectile dysfunction, but my doctor told me, ‘It does feel a little enlarged’. Which is every man’s nightmare. He fast-tracked me to Carmarthen hospital, and that was the start of it.
I was diagnosed in the March or April, and I had the operation at the end of July. I was lucky to be fast-tracked, and they took biopsies straight away. I had to wait six weeks for an MRI scan and they confirmed that they could see dark spots. When they analyse those, they give you what they call a Gleason score. Mine was seven, which meant there had to be intervention of some sort. I have spoken to quite a few tradesmen who got a lower score, and they’ve been put on a monitoring list.
After sharing the news with my cousin Victor, I realised there was a history of prostate cancer in the family. I told him, ‘Hey look, you need to get yourself tested because it might be in the family,’ and he said, ‘I’m ahead of you there’. It turns out our joint grandfather had it, and I later found out my father had it too. I thought, I wish I’d known that, then I might have had a bit of a heads up.
I opted for the operation, because they basically told me it was contained and that I was fit and healthy enough through my work and my passion for surfing. They could see I had a strong chance of making a full recovery. Brave words – I told them, ‘Yeah, let’s cut it out. Kick it to the gutter!’
The main thing I was worried about was ‘sparing the nerves’ which are the techniques designed to preserve or avoid damage to nerves during surgery. Damage to nerves can cause erectile dysfunction and loss of bladder control. I remember the last thing I said to the surgeon before the anaesthetic kicked in was, ‘nerve sparing!”
Recovery took about six weeks or so, and I was a bit battered about after. It did impact me on my job too. Because of where you’ve been operated on and the nature of roofing, you get stress incontinence, which as you can imagine is awkward on a building site. And you’ve also got a catheter to deal with. So I managed to find a desk based health and safety role for three days a week, which meant I could sit down and not do too much active work. But like I said, I’ve never been able to stay away from construction. It wasn’t long before I was filling the last two days with little roofing jobs. Ironically, I was spending three days a week preaching health and safety, and two days a week hanging off a roof by my fingernails!
As a self-employed person, you’re obviously very aware of being the breadwinner and bringing the income into the house. I went on employment support, which is open-ended, thankfully. You don’t have to think, ‘Oh God, I need to be better in four months’ or anything, you don’t need that pressure as well as what’s going on, you know?’. I was relatively lucky – I didn’t have a huge mortgage at the time and was able to rely on my other skills, but not everyone can do that. I now advise people to take out insurance policies, or have a few months saved up just in case. I’d encourage open conversations with the boss so that adjustments can be made at work. For example, if you’re a brickie, maybe you could do something a little less strenuous for a while.
The NHS have always been stretched, but to be fair, they save your life. Once they’ve ticked that box, they’re on to the next, which doesn’t address your mental health. I went to Macmillan, who were brilliant. They gave me six sessions of counselling absolutely free, which was really helpful, and they let me know what benefits were available and stuff like that. You really don’t want to be worrying about other things at that point, you want to concentrate on getting better.
I also had access to a prostate cancer support group for West Wales, and they were very supportive. If there’s somebody in your area who has been diagnosed with it, you can ask to speak to them. It’s great, because you’ve got access to all those different people who have already been down that route.
I’m trying to do my bit to spread awareness now, and I’m open about it on site. I have taken part in the Distinguished Gentleman’s Ride twice now, which is an incredible event. Classic motorbike enthusiasts from all over the world get together for a ride in their most dapper outfits, all to raise awareness for prostate cancer and men’s mental health.
I’d like to think that if anyone was struggling, they’d know they can come to me. There was someone locally who was on the road I was on, and I said he was more than welcome to talk to me, but he decided not to. It’s about breaking those barriers, starting a conversation. It’s very difficult to say, ‘I feel a bit vulnerable’, but it’s surprising how many people are dealing with it when you do break that thin ice. Someone might say, ‘Oh God, my uncle had that,’ and I’ll say, ‘Well have you had a PSA test?’. People don’t seem to know it’s just a blood test to start with, they’ll ask, ‘Doesn’t he want to put a finger up my bum?’. As soon as anyone says prostate doctor, that’s what they think.
More and more people are aware of it these days and the importance of having a simple PSA test. So we’re getting there, but we still need better education and awareness of the topic. I did see a campaign banner on a site somewhere and it said, ‘Don’t be a dick, it’s only a prick’, which I thought was just fantastic.
That’s the message I want people to take away really, don’t waste time feeling ashamed or embarrassed, just get it sorted, the sooner the better.
If you can relate to Gareth’s story or you’re concerned about your health, help is here – call our free 24/7 helpline 0345 605 1956 (UK) 1800 939 122 (ROI) or live web chat with one of our advisors at www.lighthouseclub.org.
